Bailout Song #1

This is your bailout, sweetie your bailout
親愛的這是一通救場電話
Honey I'm calling to bail you out
我來拯救你啦
You can tell him your dad's in the hospital
告訴他你爸住院了
Your building's on fire
或者你的房子著火了
That's all you need to say
只需要說出這些
and you're free on your way
然後你就自由了
It's your bestie calling, It's Reggie to the rescue
這裡是你的好閨蜜Reggie
Who do save you from another catastrophic blind date
助你擺脫這場災難般的約會
I've done it time and again, save you from horrendous men
我曾經多次幫你逃離那些可怕的男人
all those losers who should never be allowed to pro-create
那些就不該出生的垃圾
The dentist with the foul breath that make you wanna yak
比如那個嘴裡味道讓你聞了想吐的牙醫
or that hippie with the hair growing only on his back
那個毛髮隻長在背上的嬉皮士
or the guy obsessed with disney
還有那個迪士尼狂粉
second thought, I'll cut him slack
但轉念一想就放他一馬吧
though his love for princesses was rather suspect
儘管他對公主們的愛有點可疑
But I'm digressing
剛剛跑題了
I'm obsessing
我很好奇
You did not pick up your cell
既然你沒有接電話
which means you either didn't hear it ring
那就意味著要么你沒聽見鈴聲
or things are going well
要么你和他處得還算順利
So e-mail, call or FaceTime tell me if you like this guy
所以發郵件打電話或者臉書告訴我你對他有沒有好感
Okay that's it
先說這麼多吧
I love you lots, need you forever, bye~
永遠愛你喲拜拜
This is your bailout, sweetie your bailout
親愛的這是一通救場電話
Honey I'm calling to bail you out
我來拯救你啦
You can tell him your grandma broke her hip
告訴他你奶奶摔傷了
or your dog ate some chocolate
或者你的狗不小心吃了巧克力
That's all you need to say
只需要說出這些
and you're free on your way
然後你就自由了
Later, bi*ch!
等會見！