Dissolving

self loathing bouncin round like you're a pinball
wish i could find someone to see me under microscope
sure i could look inside myself but
i genuinely dont know what my heart is for
its getting hard to tell what the **** is anything anymore

i wont need to know when i get
out of it / my vessel / of bull****
i wont need to know when im getting
cremated / sweet fire of / my death bed

i cant help but see some good inside her soul
kinda makes me feel irresponsible
guess its a self-fulfilling prophecy but
i know im tired too of this self-pity ****
its feeling like a trap i cant escape

i dont wanna die i just feel like
im falling / ignoring / the problem
i dont wanna die i just feel like
im drowning / dissolving / to nothing

to nothing
at least for now