save yourself

And i know you think you know me
我知道，你覺得自己了解我
But you don't know where i've been
但你不了解我所處於的困境
I' m a mess
我現在一片混亂
Whats happiness when you just fxxk it up again?
若你再遇到困難，我可能都不知道什麼是幸福了
I might lose my way
我可能會失去方向
I might not come back
我可能會無法恢復
I know you try to stay to help
我知道你試著留下來幫助我
But go and save yourself
但請離開我，去拯救你自己吧
This ain't a way to be livin, i get it
這不是一種生活的方法, 我知道的
Didn't know bad it was until you actually said it
直到你真正說出來，我才意識到有多糟糕
Breakin down but tellin everyone i'm fine
即使很崩潰，但我依然和別人說我很好
I know i promised I would talk before i crossed that line again but didn't
我記得和你承諾過再遇到麻煩會說出來，但我沒有
Yeah, i guess thats just the way my head works
或許這是我唯一能想到的辦法了
Open up another couple scars before you mend yours
在你傷口還沒恢復之前又給你帶來傷害
I dont learn from watching others crash, i gotta wreck first
我沒有從別人的不幸學會珍惜，而是先學會了破壞
cause i dont think that love is really love until you get hurt, yeah
因為我不認為那是真正的愛，直到受傷之後
And i know what you think
我知道你的想法
Said its hard to love me when i dont love myself and im on the brink
你曾說過，在我不懂得照顧自己、處於崩潰邊緣的時候很難去愛我
Of trading in this sobriety for a fxxking drink
只能用酒精麻醉自己
And i don't wanna talk about it till we're bout to sink, yeah
在我們宿醉之前，我都不想談論它
Maybe i just need a day off
也許我只是需要休息
Maybe i'm just more fxxking comfortable in the chaos
也許我只是需要在這種混亂的情緒中放鬆下來
You say you love me, so you stay on
你說你很愛我，所以留下來陪伴我
Invested all your time and wonder when it's gonnapay off, huh?
傾盡你所有的時間陪伴我，期盼著哪天能讓我恢復，是吧？
And i know you think you know me
我知道，你覺得自己了解我
But you don't know where i've been
但你不了解我所處於的困境
I'm a mess, whats happiness
我現在一片混亂
When you just f*ck it up again?
若你再遇到困難，我可能都不知道什麼是幸福了
I might lose my way
我可能會失去方向
I might not come back
我可能會無法恢復
I know you try to stay to help
我知道你試著留下來幫助我
But go and save yourself
但請離開我，去拯救你自己吧
So afraid of the failure that now im barely livin
我非常害怕失敗只能苟且生存
Spent a lifetime of working with nothin left to give it
付出了一生的時間在工作上，最後也一無所有
Lookin back at the things we been through and feel i miss it
回過頭看我們曾經在一起生活的日子，讓人非常想念
I been running forever, i don't know how you didn't
我一直拼命工作從未停歇，不知道你現在怎麼樣了
When you're sitting right next to me, don't know where i go
即使當你坐在我旁邊時，也不知道我所想的是什麼
I'm in my head with these songs and pick apart every note
這些歌在我腦海裡，每一個音符都記憶猶新
These insecurities killing me but i never show
那些不安全感幾乎快讓我窒息，但我從未吐露
The things i'm thinking are probably worse than you'll ever know
那些我正心煩的事，可能比你想像的更嚴重
Yeah, we been feeling like we can't move
我們都感到身不由己
Same house, same walls, but a different view
現在已經物是人非了
Spending time avoiding this inconvenient truth
只能讓時間沖刷那些我不願去面對的事實
I got some problems and i'm sick of trying to blame you
遇到問題不再去責怪你
cause i feel, like i been, on my own , in my head
因為我只能去獨自面對
The light goes, and i see you fall when standing beside me
燈光亮起，我看見你站在我身邊一副失落的模樣
And every night i lie awake
每個晚上我都睡不著
Tryin to fight but every day, im feeling less, feeling less like me
拼命地掙扎，但日復一日我感覺越來越不像我自己了
Still waiting for me to open up
依舊在等我敞開心扉
She aint cheating, just fantasizing bout who i was
她沒有欺騙，只是幻想著我的樣子
Fell in love with this image that i portray, but know it aint a lie
愛上了我給她所描述的這個形象，但我知道這不是個謊言
Its who i want to be at the end of the day
她是我願陪伴終生的人
I know the feelings and the thoughts will keep me down
我知道這些思緒會讓我變得失落
Depression and anxiety, hanging inside the clouds
沮喪和焦慮遍布雲端
No matter where i go, they keep following me around
無論我在哪，這些情緒都纏繞著我
And you think that one day, i can make it out
你覺得有一天我能夠掙脫
And i know you think you know me
我知道，你覺得自己了解我
But you don't know where i've been
但你不了解我所處於的困境
I'm a mess, whats happiness
我現在一片混亂
When you just fxxk it up again?
若你再遇到困難，我可能都不知道什麼是幸福了
I might lose my way
我可能會失去方向
I might not come back
我可能會無法恢復
I know you try to stay to help
我知道你試著留下來幫助我
But go and save yourself
但請離開我，去拯救你自己吧