always December

Verse 1:
Snow is falling its middle July
Just another day here in my mind
Cant escape whats inside
Ive been running my whole damn life
Years go by but the colors wont change
Been so long since Ive felt anything
Feelings fading so fast
Like Im watching my own life through glass
Chorus:
No one sees but its always December in me
No matter where I go its pouring rain
In my head seasons never change
And its killing me
No one sees but its always December in me
Tried so hard to be brave
But the reasons this lifе is worth living
Get hard to remembеr
When its always December
Verse 2:
Black and white only colors I see
Sunless sky somehow stuck on repeat
But I hold it all down
Dont want anyone to feel this but me
Im only free from it when Im asleep
The more I think the more I feel myself sink
Back to this empty place
Its a nightmare I could never explain (never explain)
Chorus:
No one sees but its always December in me
No matter where I go its pouring rain
In my head seasons never change
And its killing me
No one sees but its always December in me
Tried so hard to be brave
But the reasons this life is worth living
Get hard to remember
Bridge:
Cant outrun the cold
When its in my head
In my head
Its been getting old
Wishing I was dead
I was dead
As this overcast suffocates me
Im done waiting on some sign of spring
Verse 3:
I would rather lay here in my bed
Than have to face what lives here in my head
Hell just being awake
Hurts much more than I could ever explain
Chorus:
No one sees but its always December in me
No matter where I go its pouring rain
In my head seasons never change
And its killing me
No one sees but its always December in me
Tried so hard to be brave
But the reasons this life is worth living
Get hard to remember
When its always December