SONIA (feat. Nitty Scott)

Once upon a time
Little girl on the grind
Met a boy he was nice
At the time

Weeks from the days
Plans they were made
Soon you could call
Them an item

Funny how a title
Makes them think
They own you
Tellin you
How to dress
Who to talk to
Fella please
Don't nobody ask you

My great great granny
Was born a slave
She found liberation
Before the grave

Who you tellin how to behave?

Oh i'm trying to forgive
But can't forget…

It was baddDDD!
It was bad

It was baddDDD !
It was bad

It was the crying that was baddDDD
It was the lying that was baddDDD
It was the blaming that was baddDDD
The self-hating that was baddDDD

It was the waiting that was baddDDD
It was the doubting that was baddDDD
It was the screaming that was baddDDD
The fear of leaving that was baddDDD

Once upon a time,
I believed in lines,
Like “i just wasn't good enough for you” & other lies
Mr. “didn't miss the water till the well was dry” .. .
Tried & i tried, compromise, compromise
It was pouring into you while emptying me
It was rationalizing all your toxicity
It was hands around my neck with us on my back
It was pressure, pain, and panic attacks

I was faded to the wire, putting out my fire
Use to have requirements that turned into desires
Expected to retire me while keeping you inspired,
All the women in me are TIRED
LISTEN *****
My abuela ain't survive several trips around the sun
So i could give it to somebody's undeserving son
This ***** don't pop for you
Booty don't bop for you,
Never owe none, belong to no one

Now i only trust patterns, not apologies
First date questions: what's your ideologies?
Do you love yourself?
Are you healing your trauma?
What's your concept of wealth?
Do you check on yo mama?

'Cause your loyalty ain't slavery, sis
That **** insulting to her bravery sis
I know you tangled but this life
Is no exchange for your laboring sis
Withhold ya flavors, he unsavory sis, sis

I remember saying no to things
That happened anyway
I remember feeling low the mirror
Took my face away
I couldn' t recognize her
I laid & cried til my
Tears washed the kitchen tiles
I swear I couldn't budge

But then I talked about it
Til momma sister cousin
Told me they went thru it
And since it's in my blood
I knew i could do it
Cuz if my blood went thru it
I knew i could endure it
I knew that i could heal it
Oh i'm trying to forgive
Nut can't forget…

It was baddDDD!
It was bad

It was baddDDD!
It was bad

It was the crying that was baddDDD
It was the lying that was baddDDD
It was the blaming that was baddDDD
The self-hating that was baddDDD

It was the waiting that was baddDDD
It was the doubting that was baddDDD
It was the screaming that was baddDDD
The fear of leaving that was baddDDD