My Perfect Cousin

Now Ive got a cousin called
Kevin Hes sure to go to heaven
Always spotless clean and neat
The smoothest you can get them
Hes got a fur lined sheepskin jacket
My ma said they cost a packet
She wont even let me explain
That me and
Kevin were just not the same
Oh my perfect cousin
What I like to do he doesnt
Hes his familys private joy
His mothers little golden boy
Hes gotta degree in economics
Maths - physics and bionics
He thinks that
Im a cabbage
Cos I hate university challenge
Even at the age of ten
Smart boy
Kevin was a smart boy then
He always beat me at
Subbuteo Cos he flicked the kick
And I didnt know
Oh my perfect cousin ..
His mother bought him a synthesizer
Got the Human
League into advise her
Now hes making lots of noise
Playing along with the art school boys
Girls try to attract his attention
But what a shame its in vain total rejection
He will never be left on the shelf
Cos Kevin hes in love with himself
Oh my perfect cousin ...