The Kind Of Friend I Need

If Im hanging a tent
如果有天我要安營扎寨
Halfway up on El Capitan
在酋長岩的半山腰上
And need a man to hammer that nail
需要有個人幫我釘釘子
I tell you, you would not be that man
這麼說吧，我反正不會找你
Well, if I get in a fight
行吧，要是有天我跟人打起來了
Somewhere in the city one night
月黑風高，在城裡某個犄角旮旯裡
Instead of asking you to step in
與其找你來平事兒
With all respect, I possibly might
沒別的意思啊
Ask the big bloke stood to your right
我寧願找你旁邊的大塊頭
Lucky is the guy in life who has got
這是何等幸運啊
Another guy in his life who can spot
一個人能有另一個人
All of the amazing things thats hes not
發現他所有不存在的優點
God, how lucky is that guy?
你說這人得多幸運？
Says you look a wreck, makes fun of your hair
說你穿得亂七八糟，嘲笑你的頭髮
But half-two in the morning when youre both worse for wear
但明明是半夜兩點半，他也好不到哪去
Gives a look back just to check youre still there
時不時回頭看看怕你跑路
Insult me and offend me
攻擊性極強，侮辱性極大
Thats the kind of friend that I need
我就需要這種損友
Thats the kind of friend that I need
我就需要這種損友
Wеll , when Ive written a song (Oh, you writе songs, do you? You didnt mention it)
有時候吧，我正寫著歌（真的嗎？你這麼有才，咋沒聽你說起過？）
Laid my heart and soul really bare (At the piano, is it?)
一心一意撲在創作（還彈鋼琴呢對吧？）
Its great to know Ive got someone there like you
真高興有你在我身邊
To say they think theyve heard it before
說你聽有人唱過這個了
Well, when Im holding the floor (Oh, here we go)
當我長篇大論的時候（好吧，又來了）
With another great anecdote (Oh yeah, bout your movie star friends?)
說名人八卦正起勁呢（還是你那個影星朋友的吧？）
It's great to see you show your support
真開心你一邊默默支持我
By looking at your watch with a yawn
一邊看著手錶一邊打哈欠
And then gesture cutting your throat
還不忘了比劃著“你可拉倒吧”
Lucky is the guy in life who has got
這是何等幸運啊
Another guy in his life who can spot
一個人能有另一個人
The entertaining superstar that he is not
發現他並不存在的喜劇天賦
God, how lucky is that guy?
你說這人得有多幸運？
Always criticizes the way that you drive
總吐槽你開車技術太臭
But is alive to the way that you feel
卻又總能察覺你的感受
And if your heads in your hands, takes over the wheel
當你氣得大撒把的時候，他又會果斷接手
Defend me and upend me
對我又恨又愛
Thats the kind of friend that I need
我就需要這樣的損友
Thats the kinda of friend that I need
我就需要這樣的損友
A friend like a shot would not dream of telling people
一個唯恐天下不亂的朋友
What happened in that bar in Berlin (Hmm, good)
放心吧，我肯定不會把在柏林酒吧的事告訴別人的
Just wouldnt dream of it
你懂得（嗯~那你可真好~）
And like that, he wouldnt choose to mention that tattoo (Thats so true)
禮尚往來，我也不會把我那個文身說出去的（太對了）
No one knew (He just simply would not do)
天知地知，你知我知（他就是不說~）
See? Right then, I chose not to
看到沒？我就是不說~
Oh lucky is the guy who finds (Oh lucky guy)
這是何等幸運啊（多幸運~~）
Hes suddenly not singing the top line
他突然間開始唱高音部了……
But oh how he climbs (All the things that hes not)
但是他這個琶音唱得吧……（（依然沉迷唱高音的詹胖）：ta並不存在的優點）
Yeah, yeah
耶耶~
Yeah, yeah
耶耶~~
Yeah, yeah (Oh, thats enough of that)
耶耶~~ ~（差不多得了）
Takes apart your songs
把你的歌唱得稀碎
Dismembers your jokes
你講個笑話他也要劇透
Puts you back on the bike
你摔倒時把你扶起
Picks dirt from your knee
還幫你撣掉腿上的泥
Knowing hes the one who threw the stick through your spokes
但其實就是他卡你輪子
Brings you down to Earth
讓你摔了個臉著地
Argue like brothers
像兄弟一樣吵個沒完
But a compliment from him is worth a thousand from others
但他的一句讚美頂別人一萬
Deflate my sails
潑我冷水
Puncture my bubble
破我幻想
Never say you love me or you know were in trouble
從來不示愛也不低頭認錯
A friend thats not too kind to me
一個對我不那麼好的朋友
Thats the kind of friend that I need, oh
不正是我所需要的嗎~~
I was the best in that song
本寶寶唱得最好~
So was I
本寶寶也不賴~~
Its my album, you know
別忘了這可是勞資的專輯…