I just need A nearly night

You know I like my time alone
Especially when rain falls and winter comes
Tired of this world
I wonder: Do I need a different one?
Do I need to change the way I see the place we live?
Do I even care enough to give a sxxt?
The answer is I probably do
'Cause sometimes you're blind to what's in front of you
Open eyes can shift a shade of blue to a warmer hue
Depending on the time
Or when the summer skies begin to fade and be replaced
Evoking changes in your mind
I feel I need to find a way out of this mess I made
Go inside, hibernate, and pray
Everything will fall right into place
They always say just give it time
Does that mean I should leave it to some divine
Power higher than what we are?
Can't say I've been a believer in a 'God'
But I've always had this feeling pulling me to what's beyond
Dust to dust
Is that all there is of us?
Delayed rent payments, late nights, laughter and getting drunk
Getting lost alone
Just to find myself amidst the contemplation of yesterday
Well, lately I've been getting better at shutting the door to the weather,
Like staying warm when it's cold in December, yeah
If they say 'life's a bxxch,' I just need an early night
So that when I rise under solemn skies
I'll be glad to know I never hit reply
When death was blowing up my line
I'll keep her out my head today
Despite her slightly thicker thighs and dark demeanor
She said life's a bxxch and I don't need her
'Come along with me, I can take you far away from your demons'
Her subtle whispers echoin a tortured mind
Find somebody else, my love, 'cause honestly I'm doing fine
You've done enough, I'm ready to take on the world
And despite all of those luscious curls , listen, girl
Yeah, what we had was nothing deep
All I needed was some sleep
I'm sure you'll still find all your pleasure
As another mother weeps.