Desperate

(Spoken)
"Our father, forgive us our trespasses
as we forgive those who trespass against us"
Woke up this morning, too depressed and shamed to leave my bed
Can't stand to see my own reflection, so I hang my head
Feel like a disappointment, like the scum of the earth
I'm so hurt, I know you see I can't cover my dirt
My soul's dying, heart's weak, I can't even cry
I'm supposed to run to you but why I'm such an evil guy
The sun's shinin', but for me it's the darkest of days
Try to pretend it never happened, but the guilt remains
I leave the house, it feels like everybody knows I did it
Feel like they readin' my mind and know the sin I committed
Through Your blood I'm acquitted, but my heart doesn't get it
Oh God I'm desperate for help 'cause I'm grieving Your spirit
I couldn't sing in Sunday service, Lord it felt fake
And when they started Communion, I just made an escape
I'm in need of Your grace feels like You hid Your face
Lord lead me back to the cross and show me my sin's erased
I'm so desperate
Can't believe I sinned against You
Create in me a clean heart (I'm so sorry)
Your mercy is what I need
I'm waist deep in my pity, is Satan trying to trick me , and tell me You won't forgive me?
'Cause it's startin' to get me
Jesus help me quickly, I hate the wrong I done
I know we all fall but I feel like the only one
Feels like I should be shunned, should I punish myself?
I know it's dumb, 'cause by Your death all my sin has been dealt
But my sin has been felt - I didn't want to do it
But what I want to do I don't, I swear I'm goin' through it
I'm tryin' to open up my Bible, need to read Your pages
Need You Lord but my guilt has got me feelin' so faithless
Help me see where grace is take me to the basics
Help me find my joy in You and not people and places
My sin is ever before me, I turned my back on You
Oh Father break and restore me and bring me back to You
My sin is ever before me, I turned my back on You
God break and restore me and bring me back to You
I'm so desperate
Can't believe I sinned against You
Create in me a clean heart (I'm so sorry)
Your mercy is what I need
Have mercy on me God according to Your steady love
Wipe away my transgressions and wash me in Your blood
Create in me a clean heart, renew a right spirit
Don't hide Your face from me God Your presence, keep me near it
I'm waiting patient on You, Lord I know You hear my cry
Restore Your joy in me for You alone I live and die
It's You I glorify 'cause You don't want my sacrifice
You want me broken and contrite and trusting in the Christ
I confess to You my sin and You show me mercy
I turn away from it demonstrating that You are worthy
Over lust, over pride, over all sin
is my affection for Jesus who died for all them
I was lost now I'm found, I was tossed to the ground
My sin weighed on me heavy but I'm no longer bound
As sure as Christ wear the crown I know that grace will abound
And even when I feel lost, I know in You I am found
I'm so desperate
Can't believe I sinned against You
Create in me a clean heart (I'm so sorry)
Your mercy is what I need